“You can’t stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.”
Acceptance was one of the first life lessons I learned and it literally changed my life. And I hope after you read this article you will look at your life in a new sense. Like everyone else I went through a period of bitching and complaining about everything. I complained about my family how they didn’t get me. They didn’t understand who I was and what I wanted out of life. I fussed about my career. How my manager didn’t allow me to use my God given talent as if it was my employer’s duty to help me find the satisfaction my soul was searching for. I complained about my ex-husband how selfish he was for not allowing me to grow when I wanted more out of life than the tiny house we owned at the time. What I did was I turned the responsibility over to everyone else. I became a crap magnet collecting crappy experiences everywhere I went. And I didn’t understand why life was so challenging.
At the time I did not realize that I had the power to change it all by simply accepting it all. I couldn’t stop the waves, but I could have learned to go with the current or perhaps even surf. I love this quote because that’s exactly what you have to do. I don’t care what issues you’re struggling with right now until you accept them and learn to go with the flow, your life will always be a struggle.
Before you can accept everything in life you have to first accept who you are. You have to embrace whatever it is you feel you are. When you come to an acceptance of who you are, then you can begin to surf.
Accepting who you are will transform your life. It will also help you find your own path in life so that you are not living someone else’s life. Acceptance can set you free from following the status quo. Once you can accept who you are, you can take actions on the things that are important to you.
I’m from Haiti and in my culture women stay home and raise a family. That is what you are expected to do. The majority of women don’t have a career. As a matter of fact they can’t think for themselves. Their husbands do all the thinking for them. He is king of the castle. I on the other hand wanted to go to Alaska and do a helicopter ride and land on the glacier and drink glacier water. I wanted to go to Hawaii and climb Diamond Head and see breathtaking views. Though I was born in a repressive culture my spirit longed for something completely different. Once I accepted my authentic self I was able to break away from all the culture norms, and I was able to create the life I desire.
You can do the same by simply accepting things the way they are. Understand that your spouse isn’t wrong. Your family members aren’t wrong that’s just the way it is. And you’re not wrong for being the way you are. Instead of complaining just accept it. Because once you accept it you not only will you set yourself free but you will also set them free. And this also allows you to take back your power. You see the only reason why you complain about the circumstances in your life is because you feel powerless. I felt powerless in my career. I felt powerless around the members of my tribe. And this feeling of powerless leads to a victim mentality. Suddenly you become a victim.
Accepting who you are will allow you to make peace with others. And when you make peace with yourself, you will find you are able to make peace with the world. When you accept everything the way it is you are able to turn the focus on yourself. By turning the focus on yourself you will discover the gifts and talents that you possess. What you have to understand is there is nothing wrong with you. You are perfect the way you are. There’s nothing wrong with your family. They are perfect the way they are. There’s nothing wrong with your husband or ex-husband and there’s nothing wrong with the person you are in a relationship with right now. You are simply different. You both see the world through a different set of lenses and it’s okay. Think about this, what would the world be like if we all liked the same thing? I think the world would be a pretty boring place. If the person you are with doesn’t fit the vision of who you are it’s okay. Just find the person who will love you the way you are.
Many women stay in relationships that don’t make them happy. They hope their partners will change. But before you know it a decade has gone by and they are still unhappy. We are all on our own separate journeys. Don’t try to change the people you are in a relationship with. Instead focus on your own journey. And as for my tribal family, by accepting my authentic self I was able to set them free and allow them to live their lives the way they see fit. So now it’s a win win situation for everyone.
What will you do today? Will you continue to complain about your spouse how he doesn’t support your dreams or will you take action on your dreams. Will you continue to complain about your job or will you go out and figure out what it is that your soul desires. No matter what you choose to do today remember you can’t stop the waves, the rain, or the wind but you can learn to go with the current.